im starting to wonderwhere the point in all of this lies?
what is that one point, where ill cross it and be like "yeah this is it"
"ivemade it"
"im making it"
"im making an impact"
"i am not isolated and cut off from all of humanity"
"i can make an impression with form"
"i can creatge an impression with form"
"i can love, with feeling"
i can express who i am, without hesitation, or delay.
I can express who i am, without any time of mortification or embarassment.
who am i
why do i need validation?
why cant i validate myself, and enjoy the process?
where is my process?
where is the space to enjoy my process?
if you didnt knew me would you love me the same?
why am i so moody?
and anti-social?
and i have "son of a gun" rolling through my head all of tghe time
why do i feel like i have to "be somebody" or "something"
why do i have such a pressing need for attention?
why do i need such grand attention?
why do i do anything for attention, even if it harms others?
why can't i feel complete unless i have a couple of eyeballs watching me and my progress?
why do i want people to know that i exist?
ehy do i need constant feedback?
why am i so weak willed?
it has to be the tv programming
making me feel as if there is one ideal reality
whereby if at any point my existence is not in line with,
unannouncedly i will combust into a compositional series of rustic kinetic energy and raw flames
why does my gallbladder hurt?
why does my
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